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Sponsee Assignments

Sponsor/Sponsee Writing Guide and Worksheets
this guide is what we have come to use as a great guide, help yourself to it!



Before Step One



1. Read from the beginning of the Basic Text, "Our Symbol" to the end of Chapter 5, "What Can I Do?".

2. Answer in writing the first paragraph after the italicized section of Chapter 4, "How It Works".

3. Write what you expect from NA.

4. Write what you expect from your sponsor.

5. Write what the exact nature of our addiction is.

6. Get a GOOD dictionary.

7. Read Chapters 1 & 2 at least 3 times before going on to Step One.

8. Read the introduction to It Works, How and Why.



Step One

Part 1



1. Read Step One out of the Basic Text every day before writing.

2. Read Step One out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write what each of the following parts mean to you:

a. We admitted

b. That we were Powerless

c. Over our Addiction

d. And that our lives

e. Had become Unmanageable

5. What is the principle of Step One?

6. Every day write on events that happened that caused strong feelings Today and from the Past. Write about the circumstances leading up to the event, the event itself, and the consequences arising from the event, be they good or bad.

7. Look up Control. Write about what part your need to Control played in these events.

8. Look up Surrender. Write about how an attitude of Surrender may have helped.



Sponsor/Sponsee First Step Worksheet



"We admitted that we were powerless over our addiction, and that our lives had become unmanageable."



The first mistake that many of us make when we come into the program, is that we think drugs is the problem. When we say to the new-comer that drugs are only symptoms of a much deeper problem (addiction), it is hard for them to understand this.



To get a better understanding of addiction, we must look at the "disease" concept of addiction. From that point of view addiction is a disease of attitudes, personality and a general negative outlook that is rooted in fear, insecurity and low self-esteem. The main ingredients of addition are obsession and compulsion. Obsession is that fixed idea that takes us back time and time again to our particular drug or some substitute, (substitute being anything that makes us feel good and gets instant gratification; such as, money, power, sex, food, anger, etc.) to recapture the ease and comfort we once knew. Once starting the process with one fix, one pill, one drink or one substitute, compulsion is being unable to stop through our own power of will. Because of our physical sensitivity to drugs and anything that makes us feel G O O D, we are completely in the grip of a destructive power greater then ourselves.



Looking at addiction from that point of view, we see how addiction makes our lives unmanageable with OR without drugs. At this point we must surrender and accept how powerless we are over our addiction. When we do this a very strange thing happens, we begin to gain power through the WE part of the program and the next eleven steps. It is often said that the First Step is our past, and the things of our past, which is with us today. The next eleven steps are our future.



Now that we have a better understanding of our addiction, let us look at some ways we can apply the First Step in our daily lives. The most obvious way is that we don't pick up that first fix, pill or drink, otherwise our lives will become unmanageable all over again. We must accept and surrender to this JUST FOR TODAY. Now, let's take a look at some NON-chemical ways we can apply this step in our lives:



1. You go out to your car in the morning and it has a flat tire. Rather than feeding into the addictive attitudes of frustration or anger, which will create unmanageability, we must accept and surrender to the fact that the tire is flat and take action to correct the situation. As addicts we tend to resist the act of surrendering and to use this step on everyday problems, thus making our lives unmanageable.



2. Another situation could be that you go out to your car, start it and the motor dies. It can't be fixed. You need it for your job. You must be able to apply the first step to this situation. Accepting and surrendering to the fact that the car can not be fixed, you gain the power to go forward to find alternative transportation. You can refuse to surrender, refuse to apply the step and allow your life to become unmanageable. The choice is yours.



As you see, the first step can and must be applied in all areas of your life. This is called living the steps. the bottom line is drugs are one symptom of our disease. The only relief we get from our disease is by working the steps. It is a new and exciting experience that will bring many changes into our lives.



One last thing that must be pointed out is the WE portion of all of our steps. All of our steps begin with WE except the twelfth, which has the word WE in the center. This makes us different from any other 12 step program. Narcotics Anonymous is a WE program and not a ME program. Part of our strength and power in recovery comes from WE. Together we can. I can't, WE can! This is why we need meetings for the rest of our lives. This is why we need daily contact with other recovering addicts. Another thing many new-comers think is, if I stop using I should be cured and I don't need the program or meetings anymore. The only way we know of to clear up this denial is to answer it this way. A non-addict (a person who does not have an addictive personality) who goes to the hospital for an operation is given a physically addictive drug for pain during a period of two weeks. He becomes physically addicted, they detoxify him and he goes on with his life without any problems. However, addicts with the DISEASE of addiction have addictive personalities. We were addicted long before we ever used.



Step One

Part 2



Write about the following questions on a separate sheet of paper and return to your Sponsor.

1. What is the disease of addiction?

2. Why is being clean not enough?

3. How was my life unmanageable in my addiction?

4. How is my life unmanageable in my recovery?

5. How do I apply the first step in my life?

6. How are our steps different then any other 12 step program?

7. Am I willing to accept the steps as a way of life?

8. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?



Step Two

Part 1



1. Read Step Two out of the Basic Text every day before writing.

2. Read Step Two out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write about your concept of insanity. Then look it up and write about what you have learned.

5. Write about your concept of sanity. Then look it up and write about what you have learned.

6. Write about your concept of faith. Then look it up and write about what you have learned.

7. Write what each part means to you:

a. We Came

b. To Believe

c. That a Power

d. Greater than Ourselves

e. Could Restore us to Sanity

8. What is the principle of Step Two?

9. Write what your "Power Greater than Yourself" is.

10. Everyday write on events that relate to "Making the same mistakes and expecting different results". Also write on events that a "Power Greater than Yourself" participated in your life.



Sponsor/Sponsee Second Step Worksheet



"We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity."



The insanity referred to in this step is not the insanity of using drugs. We were restored to sanity of not using drugs in Step One. We now find ourselves clean and our lives are still unmanageable in many areas. Much of that unmanageability comes from doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results each time. Of course, the results were always the same: unmanageability and insanity in our lives. There is nothing left to do except go on the best we can or we can begin to change, with the Second Step as our guide through ongoing recovery.



The next question we begin to ask is, "What is this Power greater than ourselves?". Many of us immediately thought this meant our Higher Power, but we are not introduced to a Higher Power until the Third Step. In the Third Step our Higher Power is the ultimate power greater than ourselves, whatever our concept of a Higher Power is. This, however, is not the power greater than ourselves referred to in the Second Step. The best way to explain it is that a power greater than ourselves can change from situation to situation. I like to call it gifts from my Higher Power. A power greater than ourselves can be the NA program itself, a sponsor, another person, pain or something we may read, ect. It is anything that makes us aware of the insanity of a situation if we act out on a character defect or negative will.



Now that we have an understanding of the Second Step, let's take a look at some of the ways we can apply it in our lives:

1. The first way we applied this step when we came into the program was that NA becomes a power greater than ourselves. It helps us get through early problems without using and teaches us different ways of doing things.

2. Something someone may share with us can become a power greater than ourselves, if it makes us aware of something we are doing in the wrong way so we can change it.

3. Pain may at times become a power greater than ourselves. Sometimes it is the only thing that will make us do something in a different way to get sane results.

4. A sponsor or some other recovering addict can become a power greater than ourselves, by making us aware of the way we are doing things.



You can see, now, how a power greater than ourselves can change from situation to situation. The important thing is to be aware of how to apply this principle in your life, so that insanity and unmanageability do not take hold. The principle of the step can be a power greater than ourselves in itself!







Step Two

Part 2



Write about the following questions on a separate sheet of paper and return to your Sponsor.



1. What is a power greater than yourself?

2. What type of sanity is the Second Step referring to?

3. How can I apply this step in my life?

4. What does this step mean to me?

5. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?



Step Three

Part 1



1. Read Step Three out of the Basic Text every day before writing.

2. Read Step Three out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write your concept of willingness. Then look it up and write about what you have

learned.

5. Write what each part means to you:

a. We Made

b. A Decision

c. To Turn our Will

d. And Our Lives

e. Over to the Care of God

f. As We Understood Him.

6. Write about how you understand God.

7. Every day write on events that you thought about longer than you needed to and the

events that you left in God's hands.

8. What is the principle of Step Three?



Sponsor/Sponsee Third Step Worksheet



"We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."



This is often referred to as a stumbling block of recovery. Many of us just get stuck here and can't seem to move on. The reason is that, as addicts, we like to take something simple and complicate it. It doesn't have to be that way, if we become willing and open minded. With that in mind, let's take a look at this step beginning with the word "Decision". What is a decision? "Decision" is an action word. It is a beginning or a starting point. Looking at it from the point of view of the program, it is the time in our lives that we let go of our old attitudes as we make mistakes and grow in spiritual principles. Being willing and open-minded is very important as far as "Decision" and the Third Step is concerned. Simply put, a decision is accepting this step into our lives.



The next part of this step is "To turn our will and our lives". What does this mean by "Our will and our lives"? "Our will" is our way of doing things. We always want to fix things the way we want them, no matter whom it hurts or destroys. That comes from the core of our disease, and that core is Self-centeredness . There is only one power that can destroy Self-centeredness and that is Spirituality. We can now begin to build spirituality in our lives. We will get a greater realization of it's strength and power in the Eleventh Step. The phrase "Our lives" simply means our day to day affairs, including our problems, our worries, and our pain.



Let's look at the words "Over to the care of God as we understood Him". Many of us can not or will not, relate to the word God. By the time we reached NA, many of us were atheists or agnostics. Some of us have a God who is vengeful. Again we need to be Willing, Open-minded and Honest. The type of Honesty which is needed here is Self Honesty. We must be honest enough to admit that there is a power higher than ourselves. It doesn't matter what that power is. The program tells us "God as we understand Him". That doesn't have to be a God of someone else's belief, but a God of your belief. This is where the confusion can come into the program. As addicts we sometimes try to push our beliefs about him on other addicts. I have heard some addicts to get down on their knees and pray to God without ever knowing if that is the God of that person's understanding. The important thing to remember is that this step means a God of your understanding. It can be the God of your childhood, a force, nature, some kind of form, intelligence or even a rock in your backyard. It is the Higher Power that you and you alone can have Faith in. As long as you relate and pray to your Higher Power the way that you understand him. The Higher Power you have today may change during recovery and that's OK, because it's your Higher Power.



Now, let's talk about "Over to the care of". One mistake we make when we don't understand this step we say "Turn it over to God". We leave out the word "care". Without the word "care", we change the entire meaning of the step. Let me give you an example of this: it's Saturday night and you and your spouse are going out for the night. You have a child. You DON'T turn your child over to the baby-sitter, you turn over the care of your child to the baby-sitter to watch and guide the child. When we turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, we do this not to become robots or carbon copies of each other, but to have the Higher Power of our understanding watch and guide our wills and our lives.



A question often asked is, "What is God's will for me?" the answer is simple. God's will for us is to act mature and responsible to the best of our ability, depending on where we are in our recovery. God's will for us grows as we grow. If we act mature and responsible to the best of our ability, the outcome of our situation will be as mature and responsible as it can be at that point in our recovery. Now, when we turn our lives over to the care of God as we understand him one of two things will happen:



1. If we are living the first three steps in our lives and in all things, we are living

maturely and responsibly then our Higher Power will work things out for us.



2. If we aren't living the first three steps in our lives, our Higher Power will allow us to feel the consequences of our actions, so we can learn from them, and then act

mature and responsible.



When we first come into the program of Narcotics Anonymous we are physically, mentally (AKA: emotionally) and spiritually bankrupt. The First Step restored us physically, the Second Step; mentally, and the Third Step; spiritually. We must maintain vigilance over these three aspects of our disease. As relapse occurs, the first to go will be the spiritual, then the mental and emotional until finally the physical ( the act of once again picking up and using). That is why it is so important to live the steps in our lives. It is the maintenance of the program. If you have no Higher Power, then try G.O.D meaning Good Orderly Direction.



One last thing we will talk about is the relationship of the Serenity Prayer to the first three steps. Once we realize the connection between the two, the Serenity Prayer becomes a powerful tool in our lives. Let's take a look at how they connect:



"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change,". The First Step, surrender and acceptance.



"The courage to change the things I can,". The Second Step, doing things differently to change the outcome from insanity to sanity.



"And the wisdom to know the difference.". This is the Third Step, doing the mature and responsible thing, not our own self-centered will.



The Third Step Prayer

"Take my will and my life. Guide me in my recovery. Show me how to live."

"Basic Text" pg. 25



Step Three

Part 2



Write about the following questions on a separate sheet of paper and return to your Sponsor.



1. What is a decision?

2. How do I make a decision?

3. What is "my will and my life"?

4. How am I going to turn my will and life over to God?

5. Why is it OK to have a different Higher Power than anyone else?

6. Why do I have to live these steps in my life?

7. What are the three phases of relapse?

8. How can the Serenity Prayer help me in life?

9. Why is being clean without living the steps dangerous?

10. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?





Step Four

Part 1



1. Read Step Four out of the Basic Text at least every week during the writing of this step.

2. Read Step Four out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write what each part means to you:

a. We Made

b. A Searching and Fearless

c. Moral Inventory

d. Of Ourselves

5. What is the principle of Step Four?

6. Read the guidelines and instructions that your sponsor gives you carefully.

7. Remember that you are not alone. You can ask questions or talk about

anything before, during or after working on this step. If in doubt, call your sponsor.

8. Call your sponsor within 24 hours of completing this step.



Sponsor/Sponsee Fourth Step Worksheet



"We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves"



Many of us sit with a Fourth Step Guide and look at it with fear. We ask ourselves, "Is this necessary?". The purpose of this worksheet is to prepare us for this step. When we understand this step and why it must be done, our attitude can be one of positive expectation rather than of fear and panic.



Let's take a look at what the Fourth Step is about. What is a "Moral Inventory"? Most of us are pretty good at taking an inventory of someone else without even knowing the facts and motives connected with that person, but now we are going to take our own inventory. We are going to use self-honesty on all the facts and feelings connected with our attitudes, personalities and behaviors. That is exactly what a moral inventory is. We are going to look at our values and morals throughout our lives, including now.



When you being to write on this topic in your guide, you are not to write just a personal history, but the feelings connected with the acts as well of feelings you have about those acts today. The reason for so much concern about feelings is that the Fourth Step is going to introduce you to your real self. The purpose of this step is not to judge you, but to let you become aware of yourself as you were in the past and as you are today. Then you will know what to change in your attitudes, behaviors and your life. This step will also release the warehouse of guilt that you have been carrying around with you. You will realize that you are not responsible for many of the things that you did in your addiction. Your disease is responsible for that. You will become aware, however, that you are responsible for your recovery. There are no longer any excuses, because you realize that you must live the steps daily or you will die spiritually, emotionally and physically.



The first three steps gave us a foundation to be able to live life on life's terms. The Fourth through Ninth steps are the cleansing and release steps that will give you the power to live that life. The Tenth through Twelve steps are the maintenance steps. Therefore we can not take any of the steps lightly. Knowing now that the Fourth Step id the doorway to the cleansing and release steps, we can go forward with an attitude of positive exception for the new life that we are growing into.



You must begin the Fourth Step by setting the goal of daily writing. Do not try to write the perfect manuscript. Write as honestly as you can without going back over it or editing it. If you can't remember what you wrote, that's OK. It won't hurt to write the same thing over again. Keep your attitude positive, because the purpose of this is for you to know yourself better.



When you are done with the Fourth Step, you will keep it to help identify patterns, defects, shortcomings and amends. You will need it when working the other cleansing and release steps. As you begin to write, even though you are doing the work, you are not alone. Your Higher Power, The NA program, and the WE of the program are with you.



Step Four

Part 2



Write about the following questions on a separate sheet of paper and return to your Sponsor.



1. What is a moral inventory of ourselves?

2. What quality of character must be used when taking an inventory?

3. Why is the Fourth Step so important?

4. What do feelings have to do with the Fourth Step?

5. Why is the Fourth Step not a history, a confession or a judgment?

6. What will the Fourth Step do for you?

7. Are you responsible for your past?

8. What are you responsible for?

9. When will you start on your Fourth Step and how are you going to do it?

10. What are the Foundation Steps?

11. What are the Cleansing and Release Steps?

12. What are the Maintenance Steps?

13. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?



Step Five

Part 1



1. Read Step Five out of the Basic Text every day until you go over Step Four with your Sponsor.

2. Read Step Five out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write what each part means to you:

a. We Admitted

b. To God

c. To Ourselves

d. And to another Human Being

e. The exact nature of

f. Our wrongs.

5. What is the principle of Step Five?

6. Make a date with your Sponsor and God to finish this step.



Sponsor/Sponsee Fifth Step Worksheet



"We admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."



The purpose of this worksheet is to prepare you for your Fifth Step. Once you have done your Fourth Step, do not look at it. Put it away until you have sat down with your Sponsor. Many addicts put off doing the Fifth Step because of fear. We have this feeling of fear because we do not understand the Fifth Step. The reason we are doing the Fifth Step is to have someone help us to know ourselves and to give us direction based on their experience in working the program of recovery. It is quite normal to want to isolate and say that we can do it alone. Each time we do that we get ourselves in trouble. Remember the Second Step tells us to do things differently if we want a different outcome. We must reach out in trust to be delivered from the insanity of isolation.



The purpose of sharing your Fourth Step with another person and your Higher Power is not to judge you, but to help you to know yourself. To guide you in the areas that you may need help. Two of the most important qualities that you will receive from doing the Fifth Step are open-mindedness and willingness. You will receive the spiritual awakening that you are not unique and (or) different. You will find that by sharing your inventory with another addict that they have experienced everything that you have, either physically, or that they have thought about doing it. The people, places, events and circumstances may be different, but the feelings are the same. After doing this step, you will have a much better understanding of the "WE" in the program. Now is the time to go forward, to pray to the Higher Power of your understanding and set a time to sit with your NA Sponsor to do your Fifth Step.



Step Five

Part 2



Write about the following questions on a separate sheet of paper and return to your Sponsor.



1. Why is it necessary to do the Fifth Step?

2. Write on the Gift you will receive in your recovery from doing a Fifth Step.

3. What type of Spiritual Awakening will you receive from the Fifth Step?

4. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?



Step Six

Part 1



1. Read Step Six out of the Basic Text every day before writing.

2. Read Step Six out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write what each part means to you:

a. We were

b. Entirely ready

c. To have God remove all

d. These defects of character.

5. What is the principle of Step Six?

6. Write the most profound Asset and most glaring Defect of everyone you know, especially everyone you see at meetings.

7. Look up Willingness, Rebellion and Decisively.

8. Every day write on events that happened where your character defects clouded your ability to think logically or wasted your time and energy.



Sponsor/Sponsee Sixth Step Worksheet



"We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."



"Entirely ready" is the key phrase in this step. The very act of living Steps One through Five makes us entirely ready. We just need to recognize this and know that our defect can be removed. How does God remove all these Defects of Character? The answer can be found in the Third Step. Before we can use the Third Step to accomplish our Sixth Step we must do some ground work. Our Higher Power will always work through us and other recovering addicts, as long as we are willing to provide the perspiration, our Higher Power will provide the motivation.



One way to do the ground work is to make a list of all of our defects on one side of the paper with a line down the center. Across from each defect, on the other side of the line, list the opposite of all the defects. For example:



INTOLERANCE TOLERANCE



FEAR COURAGE

RESENTMENTS FORGIVENESS



After we have completed this list to the best of our ability, we can focus on the assets we wish to have. This becomes our goal.



Now that we are entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character, we will move on to the Seventh Step. Most of us, being addicts, will say that this sounds too simple. Remember the words of the Sixth Step, "We are entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." This is what we did. We became "entirely ready". During the Fourth Step we got in touch with our innermost feelings and with ourselves. During the Fifth Step we share this with our Higher Power, ourselves and another human being. During our Sixth step we use the Fourth and Fifth Steps to see our defects of character and patterns. We look at them and go through the work of listing them on paper. All of this adds up to being entirely ready.



Step Six

Part 2



Write about the following questions on a separate sheet of paper and return to your Sponsor.



1. What are the key words in this step and what do they mean to me?

2. When did we become aware the we are entirely ready?

3. How does God remove these defects of character?

4. What do I replace my defects with?

5. Write your list of defects and their opposites.

6. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?

Step Seven

Part 1



1. Read Step Seven out of the Basic Text every day before writing.

2. Read Step Seven out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write what each part means to you:

a. We Humbly

b. Asked Him

c. To remove

d. Our shortcomings.

5. What is the principle of Step Seven?

6. Everyday write on events where you were afraid to be yourself

7. Write everyday on events that happened that you accepted and honestly tried to be yourself.

8. Look up Humility. Write about how an Attitude of Humility may have, or did, allow you to be yourself.



Sponsor/Sponsee Seventh Step Worksheet



"We Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings."



Let's talk about "shortcomings" before we get into this step. Are shortcomings the same as defects? The answer is both Yes and No. As strange as that might seem, 'tis true. We say that they are the same because shortcomings have their roots in defects. We say they are different because a shortcoming is a "acting out" of a defect. Let's take the defect of impatience as an example. You are waiting to pick someone up for a meeting. You are doing them a favor and going out of your way. At 7:00pm you arrive on time. It is now 7:20pm and they are not ready yet. You might be late for the meeting. At this point many of the shortcomings of the defect of impatience are about to be acted out. You may get angry, frustrated and resentful. These are some of the shortcomings that are born of the defects of impatience. Many of the same shortcomings come from different defects.



In the Sixth Step we become entirely ready to have God remove all our defect of character. In the Seventh Step we will see how God does this when we humbly ask Him to remove our shortcomings. Before we actually learn how to apply this step, let's look at what the Seventh Step says. It begins with "We humbly asked Him". When we recognize the fact that we are responsible for our shortcomings, even though we are not responsible for our defects, we are becoming humble. In the First Step we learned that we are not responsible for having the disease and the defects are part of the disease. The defects will always be there, but they can be arrested and the shortcomings are removed.



Understanding our shortcomings, or "acting out" on our defects is our responsibility. We become humble when we accept this fact. What we do is just apply the First Step to our shortcomings, then we see the insanity of acting out our shortcomings and decide to act differently. In deciding that we are going to act differently, we apply the Second Step to our shortcomings. Finally we turn our lives and our shortcomings over to the care of the God of our understanding. This will give us the strength and the courage to act mature and responsible since it is applying the Third Step to our shortcomings. The solution to all of our problems can be found in the Steps. The first three steps become the foundation of our solutions and the Tenth, Eleventh and Twelfth Steps are the way to keep our solutions working. This is a lifetime process because our disease is always with us, waiting for us to let our spiritual guard down so it can strike at us. This is why we go to meeting for the rest of our lives and stay close to NA people, so that we can stay green. Remember, when you are green you are growing, when you are ripe you begin to rot!



Step Seven

Part 2



Write about the following questions on a separate sheet of paper and return to your Sponsor.



1. What is the difference between defects and shortcomings?

2. How do we become humble?

3. What are shortcomings?

4. How do we keep our disease from resurfacing?

5. What are defects?

6. Why do we have to go to meeting as long as we are alive?

7. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?



Step Eight

Part 1



1. Read Step Eight out of the Basic Text every day before writing.

2. Read Step Eight out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write what each part means to you:

a. We made

b. A list of all persons

c. We had harmed

d. And became willing

e. To make amends

f. To them all.

5. What is the principle of Step Eight?

6. Make a list of all persons whom you feel have harmed you.

7. Look up Forgive, Forgiven and Forgiving.

8. Go over the list of all persons whom you feel have harmed you with your sponsor.

9. Make a list of all persons you feel you have harmed.

10. Take each name and write what you are willing to do to make things right.



Sponsor/Sponsee Eighth Step Worksheet



"We made a list of all people we have harmed and became willing to make amends."



Many addicts become OVERWHELMED when they start this step. We don't understand why we have to deal with this part of our past. We feel that we dealt with these things as best we could when we did the Fourth and Fifth Steps and therefore are not very willing to make a list. What we must remember is that this step does not say to become willing and then make a list. It says to make a list and then become willing.



We can now see that this is a two part step. Let's talk about the first part of the step, making a list. The first two names that should be put on your list are your Higher Power and then yourself. Many times we get stuck with the old con, "did we really harm this person?". If there is any doubt at all, put their name on the list! Many times in our addiction there were faceless people that we had harmed. Many we never really knew; others, we just can't remember their names. Make one entry on your list called "Faceless People". In the Ninth Step you will be told what to do with them. Once the list is done, you will be ready to work on the second half of this step.



This part of the step can be very difficult if we approach it with the wrong attitude. We must accept the fact that NA says we must live all the steps in our lives if we are to have a program of recovery. Remember the First Step is our past and the things of our past that are with us today. The next eleven steps were in our future. If we are to have any future that is productive and manageable, we must the responsibility to be willing. The way to do this is to accept the fact that we are powerless and surrender. We must do this. It is the First Step applied to the Eighth. Next, we must realize we cannot afford to be unwilling. We must do things a different way and be willing. In other words, act mature, responsible and make amends.



We have applied the Third Step to the Eighth. Throughout these worksheets we talk about the first three steps in relation to the other steps. By now you must realize how these steps must be lived and applied in every area of our lives. Without the steps we are dead.



Step Eighth

Part 2



Write the following on a separate piece of paper and return to your Sponsor.



1. How many parts are there to this step?

2. Why must you start this step even if you are not willing?

3. Why must all the steps be lived?

4. How do I become willing?

5. How are the first three steps used in the Eighth Step?

6. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?



Step Nine

Part 1



1. Read Step Nine out of the Basic Text every day before writing.

2. Read Step Nine out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write what each part means to you:

a. We made

b. Direct amends

c. To such people

d. Wherever possible

e. Except when to do so

f. Would injure

g. Them or others

5. Taking your list from the Eighth Step, write how you would contact each person.

6. Write about anyone who may be harmed by direct amends. How or why?

7. DO NOT MAKE AMENDS without first talking with your Sponsor about it.



Sponsor/Sponsee Ninth Step Worksheet



"We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others."



This is quite simple when we approach it with an attitude of positive expectancy. This is the last of the cleansing and release steps. Many doors in our recovery will begin to open for us after we complete this step. Our growth will astound us. Knowing this alone will give us an attitude of positive expectancy.



We do exactly as this step says. We make direct amends to such people wherever possible. But what about those people that we can't locate, or those whom we never knew, all those faceless people?



Remember the first name we put on our list, our Higher Power. We can make amends through our Higher Power to all those faceless people and to those we can not locate. This second name on the list is yourself. How do you make amends to yourself? We must realize that we started to make amends to ourselves the day we walked into N.A. We continue to make amends to ourselves as we live the steps and carry the message of N.A. to other addicts. We can never give away more then we have, because as soon as we give it away, our Higher Power gives us twice as much as we gave.



The next part of the step is "except when to do so would injure them or others". We must remember that sometimes in trying to make amends, the amends themselves may injure the person you are trying to maker amends to. As an example: in your addiction you injured someone by stealing from them. In verbally making amends you may injure them by shocking them and causing them to have a resentment. You may want to handle this amend by reimbursing them and make your amends through your Higher Power. It is important to go over each of your amends with your Sponsor to get direction on how to make each of your amends so you do not injure those people. When the steps refer to them or others, remember that you are one of those "others". You must make sure that the amends do not injure you. That would be pure irresponsibility. Be sure to go over the list with your Sponsor.



One last word on the Ninth Step. Many addicts would like to justify reasons why not to make amends. This is our disease talking. The step does not say others are to make amends to us, no matter what they did to us. This step tells us that WE are to make direct amends.



Step Nine

Part 2



Write the following on a separate piece of paper and return to your Sponsor.



1. What kind of attitude must we have when we do this step and why?

2. How do you make amends to people you can't locate?

3. Under certain circumstances, can amends injure someone?

4. Why is it important to go over your list with your Sponsor?

5. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?



Step Ten

Part 1



1. Read Step Ten out of the Basic Text every day before writing.

2. Read Step Ten out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write what each part means to you:
a. We continued
b. To take personal inventory
c. And when we were wrong
d. Promptly admitted it.
5. What is the principle of Step Ten?
6. Every day complete the inventory in I.P.#9 "Living the Program" or write on events that happened be they good or bad.
7. Look up Promptly. Write about how promptly admitting our wrongs (to yourself or others) could have or did help today.



Sponsor/Sponsee Tenth Step Worksheet

"We continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it."

This is the first of the maintenance steps. It is a very important step because it covers the Fourth and Fifth Steps on a daily basis. By taking a daily inventory, we can eliminate the building up of many of the things we dealt with the Fourth through Ninth Steps.

We approach this step in two parts. The first part, "personal inventory" is divided in to two parts. The first part is going over our day. Getting in touch with the way we handle things through out the day, good and bad. The second part of a personal inventory is to find the things that we do not handle well and take a look at them. After we do that, we go to the First Step and admit that we didn't handle them well because of our addiction. Then we go to the Second Step and see how we could have handled them differently. Finally we go to the Third Step and make a decision to turn them over to the care of the God of our understanding to help us handle them in a mature and responsible way. Again we see the importance of the first three steps in connection to the other steps.

The second part of the step deals with "when we were wrong, we promptly admitted it". There is a lot of confusion about this part of the step. Many addicts seem to think it goes with "sorryitus". Although apologies are a part of it, there is much more. "We promptly admitted it" applies to the self honesty which is very important when we take our personal inventory. When we are wrong, we must promptly admit it to ourselves if we are going to do any thing about it.

Many times as addicts we will go around telling everybody that we are sorry. This is not the answer!! Sorry means nothing if we continue to keep doing the same thing over and over again. We must use self honesty to admit our wrongs to ourselves so that we can apply the first three steps to our situation. This takes practice, practice and more practice. To learn to live the steps, we must practice the steps. We should not strive for perfection, but we should strive to practice these steps every day.

One last thing to say on this step. The question, "is this step done mentally or is it done with pen and paper?" is often asked. In the beginning it should be done with pen and paper, but as experience is gained with practicing the step, you begin to do it mentally.





Step Ten

Part 2



Write the following on a separate piece of paper and return to your Sponsor.


1. What is a personal inventory?
2. How do you do a personal inventory?
3. "When you were wrong, promptly admit it", what does this mean?
4. In what way do the first three steps apply to the Tenth Step?
5. Why is the Tenth Step necessary?
6. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?



Step Eleven

Part 1



1. Read Step Eleven out of the Basic Text every day before writing.

2. Read Step Eleven out of It Works, How and Why.

3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write what each part means to you:
a. We sought
b. through prayer and meditation
c. to improve
d. our conscious contact
e. with God as we understood him
f. praying only for knowledge
g. of His will
h. for us
i. and the power
j. to carry that out.

5. What is the principle of Step Eleven?
6. Every day pray and meditate as suggested in Step Eleven of the Basic Text.
7. Every day write on events that happened where you will was different than God's will for you and what happened.
8. Every day write on events that happened where your will and God's will for you were the same and what happened.




Sponsor/Sponsee Eleventh Step Worksheet

"We sought through prayer and meditation to improve out conscious contact with God as we understand Him, praying only for the knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out."

Her in the Eleventh Step all the work we put into the steps seems to come together. As we learned to live the Tenth Step, we have been practicing prayer and meditation even though we may not have been aware of it.

Our starting point here will be consciously improving our prayer and meditation to the God of our understanding. The program of NA is not about telling you how to pray and meditate. That is a technique that is developed by yourself in relation to your Higher Power and the way you feel comfortable. However, many addicts keep asking "How do I pray?" and "How do I meditate?". These examples are here only to give you a place to start and then develop your own way. You will know which is the right way for you by the way you feel. The feeling of serenity and the lack of stress will tell you that you have made conscious contact. One of the following may fit your needs or you may develop your own. Remember it is a God of your understanding and a conscious contact you can relate to.



Here are some examples of how different addicts pray.

1. Simply telling a Higher Power thank you and feeling gratitude for all the things that enriched my life. An attitude of gratitude

2. Another addict may simply feel comfortable getting on his knees and saying thanks and asking for things he needs such as strength, courage, ect...

3. Another addict's form of prayer may be simply getting in a sitting or lying position, totally relaxed, giving thanks and asking for his needs.

4. Another may simply pray by walking, getting in touch with nature, giving thanks and asking.



Here are some examples of how some addicts meditate.



1. Lying or sitting and just getting a feeling of serenity and bathing in it.

2. Walking and feeling serene by getting in touch with nature around us.

3. Sitting and looking at a picture of a beautiful scene or seeing the scene in their mind and getting serene and at peace.



There is no set way . It is a personal decision between you and your Higher Power. Prayer is the asking part. Meditation is the listening part. Meditation is necessary. If you had a friend who did the talking all the time and never took time to here you, eventually they would no longer be your friend. Prayer is the talking , and meditation is the listening.


"Only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out" is the next part of the step. As we practice these principles in our lives, the core of our disease, self-centeredness, will be arrested and we will begin to act in a mature and responsible way in all our affairs. An awareness of this begins when we discover that God's will for us is to practice these steps in our lives and that we gain this power through prayer and meditation.



Step Eleven

Part 2



Write the following on a separate piece of paper and return to your Sponsor.
1. What is prayer?
2. What is meditation?
3. Why is prayer and meditation important?
4. Is there any certain way to pray and meditate?
5. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?



Step Twelve

Part 1


1. Read Step Twelve out of the Basic Text every day before writing.
2. Read Step Twelve out of It Works, How and Why.
3. Write down your definition of each word in the step. Then look up each word individually in the dictionary and write down what you learn about the difference between what you thought it meant and the dictionary says it means.

4. Write what each part means to you:
a. Having had
b. a Spiritual Awakening
c. as a result
d. of these steps
e. we tried
f. to carry
g. this message
h. to addicts
i. and to practice
j. these principles
k. in all our affairs.


5. What is the principle of Step Twelve?
6. Every day read Chapter 5 "What Can I Do?" before doing the next writing assignment.
7. Every day write on events that happened where you "Practiced these principles".
8. The steps Do not end here. They are a new beginning!!



Sponsor/Sponsee Twelfth Step Worksheet



"Having had a Spiritual Awakening as a result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to addicts, and to practice these principles in all of our affairs."



This step gives us direction for what we must do in our affairs. The spiritual awakening as a result of these steps is very simple. The awaking is that the steps work and that we must carry the message that they work to other addicts. The awaking also tell us that we must practice these principles in all our affairs.
Very simply this step tells me to carry the message of the steps and live them in my life. Carry the message also means that I must give to the NA program so it can give the message of the steps to other addicts. If I am to live the steps, it means that I must get involved in service in some way. I no longer have an excuse. This is not the end, it is a beginning of a new way of life. There is never an end to learning the steps. It is a lifetime journey. We don't graduate. We don't get a diploma. We just grow if we live the steps, otherwise we go. Live the steps or die.



Step Twelve

Part 2



Write the following on a separate piece of paper and return to your Sponsor.
1. What is the Spiritual Awakening?
2. How does the Twelfth Step tell us to get involved?
3. After reaching the Twelfth Step, is it the end?
4. What is the message that we carry to addicts?
5. What Spiritual Awakening did you have as a result of this step?

__________________
The best way to make a dream come true is to wake up"

There’s no right or wrong way to do the steps of any 12-step program. It’s simply a matter of what works for the individual and what’s agreed upon between sponsor and sponsee. Some of us rework the steps in pursuit of further healing and spiritual growth. Some simply commit to practicing steps 10, 11, and 12 in our daily lives.

After a Relapse...

For others of us, reworking the steps comes in response to relapse. The pitfall here is that we can see them as instructions we got wrong the first time or as a punishment for going back out.

The steps should always be viewed as opportunities. Making the most of them hinges on our attitude and on our willingness to change.

T.I.M.E. (This I Must Earn)

T.I.M.E. takes time. This adage has multiple interpretations. It’s a call to be increasingly patient and tolerant with ourselves. To do this is to be kind and a great many of us struggle to be kind to ourselves.

This I Must Earn as it applies to the steps:

Steps 1, 2, and 3: We earned/qualified for our seat in a 12 step program through suffering and became eligible for transformation through the gift of desperation. We don’t earn them again; we return to them because we hurt, because we’ve distanced ourselves from a power greater than ourselves, and/or because we lose ourselves in our quest to reinvent ourselves.

Steps 4-9: Nobody ever said that step work is fun, only that it’s worth it! These steps are a lot of work. They involve bringing the skeletons out of the closet, into the light, and working through/releasing/grieving/resolving our past. These steps ought to be done slowly, incrementally, and in the company of supportive and loving people.

Steps 10, 11, and 12: The only way to keep it is to give it away... and when we do, it comes back to us tenfold. These steps allow us to be of service to others. They provide continued discovery and acceptance of self and others.

Finding What We Seek

Reworking the steps is best done with intention. The more clarity we have as to what we’re looking for, the more likely we are to find it.

I ask my Higher Power (HP) for absolutely everything. I do this not with the expectation that it will change what my HP is going to do, but rather based in the belief that my HP is already trying to give me everything I need and (quite often) better than what I think I want. In this light, asking makes me more mindful and receptive.

Breaking Down the Steps This Time Around:

Step One

No matter how good a program we’re working and no matter how good our lives become, there will always be times when our lives become unmanageable. We will at times be powerless over things that rob us of serenity.

Returning to step one is as simple as acknowledging powerlessness, sharing our burdens, and seeking support in restoring our lives to manageability.

Steps Two and Three

Many of us have found that there are only two times in which we distance ourselves from our Higher Power: when things are going especially well and when they’re going badly. When we “came to believe” we did not experience a once and for all transformation. We find that at times we take our will back.

Surrendering anew not only restores us, but in reconnecting, countless new possibilities are created.

Steps Four and Five

As an addictions therapist, I’ve often found that what folks omit from steps four and five often contributes to relapse. There are often things we found too painful to explore and admit our first time through. For many of us, these relate to past abuse – especially sexual abuse in our childhood. In the halls of AA and NA, if you’re a survivor, you’re in good company.

Steps four and five ask us to identify our part in things. Too many of us get stuck trying to find something that isn’t there. We didn’t have a part to play in our abuse and we have nothing to be ashamed of. Keep it simple. If there are things you cannot share with a sponsor, consider utilizing outside supports.

Survivor groups, professional counselors, and clergy can be of great service in recovering from past abuse/trauma and integrating the pieces of ourselves.

Steps Six and Seven

These are often referred to as the “silent steps” because they’re personal and ongoing. Character defects are always a work in progress. Instead of telling yourself that you shouldn’t be this way, accept that you are and then work to improve on it.

Make plans and ask for greater accountability in achieving incremental change.

Steps Eight and Nine

One of the less joyous aspects of recovery is that memories continue to surface even after long-term sobriety. We often find that there are further amends to make. Write them down, guard against procrastination, and think about how you’ll feel after you make them.

Relief is great stuff!

Steps Ten, Eleven and Twelve

AA’s book Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions highlights a particularly poignant struggle regarding taking stock on a daily basis: “The emphasis on inventory is heavy only because a great many of us have never really acquired the habit of accurate self appraisal (pg 89).”

We struggle to judge ourselves in the manner in which we judge others. We are free to apply the “Golden Rule” in reverse. We are free to honor how others in recovery see us, and ultimately, to honor how our HP sees us.

The best people in the world are in recovery from something and you are one of us

About the author Jim LaPierre:
My story is I'm forever a work in progress and I love connecting with REAL people who are doing great things. I'm blessed to be making a living doing something I love. I'm a proud dad and the luckiest husband ever. I'm an aspiring author - check out my recovery blog at: recoveryrocks.bangordailynews.com Thanks! Jim

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